I just want to send out my prayers and my sympathy to those hit by Katrina . I am just sickened inside by all the devastation in that area. May all of you find some kind of peace and serenity in this time.. Please take care...
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As I hide behind the tree You do not know that I am there, Though I think you would not even care As you sit and watch the storm clouds brew, You do not know that I love you And when the raindrops start to fall, You do not even here my call When you put your arm around her waist, It is the bitterness that I taste As I watch you walk away, You do not hear the words I say: 'I love you but you do not know, Therefore I shall let you go.' |
Here I am sitting here at my computer writing in this Blog while He is out in the kitchen washing the floor....why is he washing the floor??? because he thinks if he does I will buy him his fix for the day... but everytime I buy his fix for him it is I and my children who pay the price he just gets nasty and mean and I can't dea; with it anymore.. I wish I knew what to do. I really do I have gotten restraining orders on him and eveything but.. then I feel bad because he literally has no friends and nowhere to go>> Why is that my problem why do I fell it is my concern whether he gets his fix or not. I am just out of my head and as I am writing this he comes out and hasto stand over my shoulder and watch what I am writing I have no privacy what-so-ever I am slowly drowning in my own insanity the one he has put on me.
today going insane,
Sheryl
Today has started as any other day. I am stuck between a rock and a hard place with him(I will call him just HIM) I don't know what to da anymore nor where to turn. My biggest problem is I feel sorry for him and GOD please tell me whay that is so true. Why should I feel sorry for someone who isn't capable of caring for himself never mind his family. I am lost and not sure anymore why I stay. Not sure if I even love him anymore > He makes that nearly impossible with his nastiness. Yes he is mean and violent and abusive at times but mostly he is mentally abusive.. I will write more later..
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